Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
