and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
