Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
