Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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