If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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