He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
