I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
