She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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