Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
