His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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