Everything about him screamed your future.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
