that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
