: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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