never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
