so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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