so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
