i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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