where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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