You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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