I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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