So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
