You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize
