Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
it's like heaven, but drunker
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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