I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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