she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Randomize
