you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Randomize