I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Randomize
