If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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