We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
