I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize