We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You have to summon your inner elephant
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize