I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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