I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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