hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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