My hand turned me down
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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