Your mouth is God's brothel.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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