Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
you never un-have a 4some
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
