my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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