the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You ruined the universe
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
