Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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