I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize