There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
