Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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