Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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