I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
