how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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