i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
