So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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