Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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