I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
