As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
