Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
