Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
